An impromptu poem from March 2014

Tom Waits is one of the coolest horse loving dudes that I know.
Now that I think about it,
A lot of dudes that love horses
Are cool.

Horses meat is eaten in Spain
They say it is good
But lots of people like horses too much to eat it,
They say its like eating dog or something
And I can see their point,
Still, Id try horse sometime
Given enough red wine and a crowd At Carnival ouotside the bar.

Tom Waits might not like to eat horse meat though.

He might find sentimental reasons

But he might say as well as I do

That given enough libation and a big enough crowd

Many people will do lots of unusual things.  

In the 60 70's ppl discover quadraphonic sound

Just look at discotechs

A sort of synchronized mob.

Under the strobe 

Under the scope

Under the spell of Babylon

Or a paradise jubebox.

Under the strobe 

Under the scope

Under the spell of Babylon

Or a paradise jubebox.

Looking up you notice a cloud 

floating across a moonlit sky

And the prefectly-formed 

cumulocirrus cloud is Inside the 

ampitheatre.  

This alarms you briefly

But the pulsing crowd reintergrates 

your attention again.

Smoke and mirrors you whisper

Against the din And think of the girl 

the one that did not bring you here 

tonight.  You think of what your 

companion from the last summer 

might say and sway to the currents 

of fresh air which  makes you feel  

like kelp in the ocean, then your 

date, who you love dearly, now that 

shes away, grabs you by your elbow 

and leads you down the dim blue hallway.

Dr Who Vs The Snake Creatures

the internet just a fog of techno
electrogonadatropins more than  just foggy audio
And visual

the sudden clap of bulky sheets of rubberized energy erupts to a scene.

The idea of multiple biologically parallel palaces in the extra galactic dimension of space time where being everywhere at once and the no where at all do make a probabilistic kind of sense shuffle
through scales in the power of 10

To About -- now!

Foucault, foggy duel
Between the humanoid
Vs. intelligent space snake
A Dr Who episode in the background
Along with a young Pat Metheny on the "gear up" shifting chords for a long haul guitar solo.  Cymbals crashed like fireworks on the horizon.  An electric hilly bass guitar punctuates the regal
Fall of night this winter.
Snapping
pistols at ten paces breaking my bones in ten different places.
Yet
the snake creature losses the bet
And a barefoot humanoid gingerly Steps out side and
Places an anachronistic step
Next to a bigger fresh dinosaur print. Then he seems to change his mind once more and steps back into his hissing time machine.
A long fog follows!  Between the sun and the Earth and eventually the moon until the latest sentient humanoid emerge from disorder
Angst  and huge bets against entropy. The Big bang was just monumental moments before the flash from polliwog to artificial intelligence, a trippy trifle to the spinning, smiling fog that broke out into a star and awoke the spirit into
gazing back into the illusive navel of creation.  On scales both big and small, we wink into the mirror and gaze into the microcosm and macro-petri dishes and dare to gaze into tomorrow.

New Poems from 2014 ("Impossibly Far Away")

Here is a rough stone I hewed from the slab of local reality
I copied bits into other poems and polished them for word choice.
The key word for this was fog and there was fog and thunder storms when I wrote this.
No cooper or tin in these lines Below
Just the bronze, mixed molten, the "old fashioned" way:



snapping and ice and slipping and  slicing through the mist, you,
All at once
You turn and twist


Floating on cold liquid water like
A frozen fog
But not  You hit like a heavy mossy trunk and shivered yourself unconcious.

Awakening icicles sway and curve
Against the bearded and opaque
Northeast wind

The moaning of clouds
Heavy and decending like
opinions from the Judges of the Sky

Then, Wooden tables and chairs
Illuminated by flicks
of afternoon lighteniing
over cold water corn bread

The knot of your accident
A faded memory of foggy
pain dull and deep in the mind.

The plenty sustains through sickness like cooper pennies at a time.

The patches and pennies of humidity you watch
Roll across the afternoon
and loiter there until moonlight

Dancing like the rain through
grape covered valleys in a very algorithmic, barometric, halographic, pattern recogniton
your visage morphs and unfolds changes in the glows of green aurora of of the forgotten time machine and the doorway to the Snake Aliens visit to South Am

Doing fields study in alternatives to  anthropology theories
From my off line laptop listenig to the frosty, fogcutting hornish melodies of Miles Davis called "All Blues."

At night: it designs deluxe light shows  and
In the mornings,
Sheets of it float above the warm updraft columns like throats of loons.
And they part the low shadows with the cold howls of four-legged nocturnal
Purveyors of the moon,

Vapors from above
Through the nose
Across the brain
Like pungent blue cheese

In the back of my mind
The perfumes of the night
Were caught in mid air between the back of my throat and a dancing happy uvula frozen like the ghost of a taste of blue cheese and rosemary on a farm fresh wheel

the green beans we cooked from the damp fields last night, tasted like asparagus this morning.  So lifted the trance of sleep and you hurried off to shopping malls and other urban maze-like jungles liberated by the slow coating of light ice
To see everything bow and turn white

The city paused and looked around, happily entangled in a no zero sum game One ship we sailing to run groundsomeday  on friendly shores impossibly far away and obscured.

And ( as a high school English teacher mighgt say) what is all this stuff about 9 dimentional space idea.  I think that is like the newest wild theory from our friends at CERN where the super collider is located.,  They seem to think that reality really has 9 dimensions rather than just 3 or 4 that we are aware of.  EVEN THOUGH THESE DIMENSIONS ARE ALL AROUND AND INSIDE US BETWEEN US AND NEITHER AT THE SAME TIME!  Sorry about the caps.

That really kinda makes me think like in the same way that I think when on a clear night I look upward and see millions of millions of galaxies and stars.  The dimensions we see there exhibit the extreemes of what our puny minds can even imagine.  And all that the ones who study it can about reality in an every day sense.  What does it have to do with me?  I ask to snap myself out of that navel gazing trance.  And there I see no similarities between  social sciences and sub atomic physics.  Yet both offer some glimpse into reality.  Somehow the definitions of subjective and objective break down due to scale.  The properties could blur into grey as we so often expect.  Particle or a wave?  waving or drowning? drowningly return to nature, naturally emerge from the dream, into another stylish delusion, deluded wake to flower scents and see yet more of creation

A spacewalk to put eyeglasses on the Hubble, we have satellites (plural here) orbiting Mars and rovers drilling holes in rocks by remote control on another planet in this solar system!  Will we ever ever be able to populate the entirety of existence before the fabric of time itself burns away and leaves behind the ashes cold and scattered abstracted out of existence.

Or will it be possibilty to exceed the limited universe as a final leap into the multiverse?  A shade of objective v subjective possibilities.  The grey of the abmbiguity and discover.  The spacecraft leaving the heilopause for the first time entering intergalactic space.  We are now the subatomic life in the pertidish of the solarsystem.  Wait on the dawn of what becomes of humanity beyond the earth.  After focus on spelling and modus tollens arguments about evolution.  Things seem much simpler now.

Quick Update from the Presnt 9 dimentional space idea

If only these posts could be read in reverse order.  Yes, I just read a year's worth of my posts -- all four of my published posts from 2013.  And I am tired tonight.  Its 31 degrees outside and I am at Henry's after eating tripe soup again with lots or "OraGano" and onlions and cilantro,   (I have lost my ability to spell well again since I have not been typoing this blog so much lately)

But today I bought new heath insurance from the nice insurance agent.  She was extremely helpful to both Eric and me.  I finalized my decision today after getting a paper from Louisiana Medicaid that I would not be eligible for their program.  So I am trying it this way for now and into the future, until we see what might work out.  Yes, I really hope Obamacare works in the long run.  Living in North LA I understand some serious reasons that things might not work out.  They are not all rational reasons: like the self fulfilling prophesy reason.  They say it wont work so it doesn't just because They say it wont.  Or worse yet because a Democrat group thought of Obamamcare, the Republican group just cant let them win.  It seems to me a lot of us vs them thinking.  Or the thing might just go bankrupt.  But then I don't really buy that a health care system can alone bankrupt its own people.  That seems ridiculous too.  Or it least it should be mathematically ridiculous to think about  Statistically or some such.  We may be a sicker nation than some may realize.  Or we may need to price things more compassionately and work on accepting the idea no one lives forever.  Americans seem to have an existential crisis at every sneeze.

But me, I have continued to work at my minimum wage job and found that I have accomplished several things so far:  I joined a money management program to alleviate my debt issues in four years time.  I have increased spending on groceries and decreased spending on dining out.  I have increased the time I spend focused on positive thoughts  I have helped to maximize profits at the job by using marketing strategies I have analyzed my budget using common business practices and accounting procedures.  I have endeavored to improve my memory, get more rest and decide how I feel about current even issues in light of there bearing on the future of this great nation.  I have to say after a year 2013 of contemplation I can still say optomistic things about the future of this country and my own modest future as well.  As long as the devils of hatred and slavery and elitism egotism and greed don't rise up and bite us anywhere it would be difficult to fend of their dastardly attack.  I have become involved with a poetry group again also and that is fun to meet with others who write for fun and entertainment.  I make that meeting every other week and we sit at an internet-less pizza place and eat salty cheesey and tomatoey bread and drink no beers but instead sip on soda.  I am thinking about getting the veniue changed to the Naked Bean coffee shop where there is still no beer but atleast there is the internet.  Naked Bean --  what a funny name for a coffee shop.

Obama's Inauguration Speech

http://youtu.be/zncqb-n3zMo

Dark thoughts and happy-place Arkansas

Tonight brings the dangerous feelings of contagion and apathy.  Everything seems catching and deadly and I really don't care enough to prevent it.  A dream I can't wake from.  The feeling of deja-vu of lightheaded-ness as if coming from under a mild anesthetic all day now just milliseconds prior to the next catastrophe that is about to happen yet having no way to stop it.

Apathy brought about by conditioning like a rat in a metal cage.  I scurry to a from being shocked and popped and made squeamish regardless of my response now.  My fate seems sealed and I await the fianl dropping of the blade albeit a long and boring while, of years and perhaps decades, with my hooded head across the chopping block.  I spend my life waiting for the executioner to arrive and it rains cold.

Anyway that's about the most cold blooded thing I could think of to write about.  It is not cold in here.  I am feeling pretty good tonight because I am safe and warm at home and it's almost time to retire for the evening.  The above vignette is about the feeling I have had in the past.  About the inability to get things going in a positive direction.  Thanks to CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) models I have been able to slowly but surely turn my thinking around.  I am still working on this but getting some of my most troubling thought down on paper and sharing them here in the blog makes me feel a lot better.

Basically I just learn to watch my thinking as a form of meditation.  Slowly  I replace the negative thinking with more positive thoughts.  When I am doing things during the day I try the same thing.  I remember watching certain ideas that I would like to change and when these ideas crop up during the day I remember how relaxed I was when I watched thee negative thoughts during meditation.  I visualize the thought changing from a negative idea to a positive idea in my mind.  It is a little like watching clouds change from one form to another.  I have to admit that I don't always know what I am thinking.  Just like one doesn't always know what a certain cloud looks like all the time.

The really difficult part is maintaining a relaxing happy place in the mind.  Seriously.  And then in a troubled moment remembering to go there when things get difficult in the real world.  I mean I get so upset sometimes.  Like this morning as I was returning from grocery shopping.  Steam was probably rising from my bald head and I had forgotten to think of being in my happy place (somewhere in central Arkansas.) As soon as I did that I regained control and stopped freaking out.  Within 30 seconds I was beginning to relax and I could feel my blood pressure returning to normal.